The CycleThe Family

Why Can't I be me?      There is not one family in the world that is exactly alike. We all live in families with different situations who have different rules and beliefs. Some of us live with both of our parents while others only live with their mother, father, or guardian, whatever the case may be. The only thing we do have in common is that we all get into arguments and disagree with each other at times. My beliefs may contradict with those of my parents, which makes me feel uncomfortable talking to them about personal situations in my life. After all, I am "their little girl."

Sometimes my parents cannot see that "their little baby" is not a baby anymore. Everyone around me is growing up and I know for myself through personal experience that growing up is hard, but at the same time that I'm growing up so are my parents. They're trying to adjust to the fact that sooner or later I'll be an adult right along with them.      The reality is that my parents are afraid. They're afraid that if anything would happen to me they would be unable to help me, and if they are unable to help me, in their eyes they have let me down. So to avoid this, they become even stricter on me so as I get older I can be independent and able to take care of myself.      The truth is that my parents have to let me learn on my own through my own mistakes. So that in the future I know what to avoid and how to approach the situation if I come across it again in my life. The only favor that I ask of my parents is to guide me the right way and let me make my own decisions. Instead of pushing me in the direction they choose, let me fall in my own path of life and make mistakes. All you have to do is pick me up when I fall and don't pull me back down. Did I do that?      Besides arguing, families go through difficulties in their lives, such as divorce, abuse, whether it is physical, verbal, emotional, or spiritual. When a teen's parents split apart, this has a great effect on the child. These effects can lead to emotional problems, problems at school, guilt, or maybe even depression. A lot of kids believe that the reason their parents get a divorce is because of them, when its not. The problems that your parents face have nothing to do with you. Most of the time they get a divorce because they feel that their lives and the lives of their children will be better off if they were separated. If you are in this situation, I can understand that it is a very hard position to be in, but you have to make the best out of it. Your parents are not doing this as a form of retaliation against you. If your parents are divorced, you should take the initiative to talk to both of your parents and continue to keep both of them in your lives. After all you have to remember, their problems have nothing to do with you even though they may cause you a lot of stress.      If you are having some hard times in your life, you should always know that there are people out there that you can talk to. You can talk to a close friend, someone in your surroundings who has a similar problem, a teacher, a family member, or even your parents themselves. On the other hand if you do not feel comfortable talking to people who you know, you can always go to a support group or a counselor around your neighborhood. Whatever you do, DON'T keep your emotions bottled up inside, tell someone, because they can eat you inside out. Should I or Shouldn't I, that is the question      Trying to keep up with school, family, and friends is hard. At times friendships can be stressful. They expect you to live up to their standards and when you don't you might not know what to expect. In today's world, society portrays the typical girl to be innocent, quiet, and studious, but truthfully none of my friends are like that.      Every time I see my friends I have to make certain decisions. Most of my friends smoke cigarettes, weed, and drink alcohol. I'm one of the few who don't. They offer me cigarettes and liquor, but I always decline the offer. I know many people who are afraid to say no. They think that if they say no, their friends would ridicule them and not be friends with them anymore. If they don't respect my decision they were never real friends.      I strongly believe that no one should be forced to do anything they don't want to. Your body is your house and if you don't respect it, what makes you think others would? Do what you think is right and be yourself, be a leader and never follow others. It's Friday night again      Don't you ever wish that you could do whatever you want? Like on Friday nights when your friends are going to a party. You can't go because your mother invited family over for dinner a week ago, and you just found out about her plans as soon as your friend calls you.      Balancing your family life with your social life is very confusing. The only way you don't get lost in the game is if your willing to compromise and know that you are not always going to get your way. You should learn how to communicate well with your parents. This will help you to know what's going on every day and there will be no confusion. When you learn how to communicate with your parents, it will also allow you to learn how to talk to your parents about certain topics that you may not feel comfortable telling them. REMEMBER communication is one of the best policies. The Cycle Researched and Written by Jaylyn and Stephanie Roman

 

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